Wednesday, 26 February 2014

Hair Talk | Natural or Relaxed?

Wednesday, 26 February 2014


I don't do these posts often as I'm don't how much you're interested in me just gabbing about what's going on with my hair, but I thought this kind of post was due.

I last relaxed my hair way back in October and today makes me currently 5 months post relaxer. I usually relax between 8 and 12 weeks, 16 at a maximum. I'm not sure why I've stalled my relaxer so long. I admit that I miss the straightness as it's been 4 months since I used heat. I also seem to be battling with endless tangling currently. At the same time I'm finding it hard to let go of the new growth and finally relax my hair.

I've toyed with the idea of a keratin treatment but as my last two times I've tried it myself didn't work out I'm reluctant to try it again. I really want to find an alternative to relaxing as I do eventually want to give up the 'creamy crack' altogether but I'm not ready to fully embrace my natural curls by transitioning just yet.

This has been an ongoing dilemma of mine and it's made me reluctant to play my hair over the past year. I used to do different hairstyles and be excited about trying something new with my hair. That feeling has subsided but I'm hoping I'll work something out soon. I guess for now I'm still unsure.

Are you experiencing any dilemmas with your hair currently?

Lesley x

47 comments :

  1. How much new growth do you have (inches/cm)? Nice job with the stretch!

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    1. Hi Kim, I pressed post by accident before I'd even written my post oops! I actually haven't measured my new growth and where I was really underprocessed last time it's hard to tell. It doesn't look like I have more than 2 inches even though it's been 5 months x

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  2. It's funny - my two sisters, my mom, and myself all decided to return to being natural on the same day! Now that I know how to style my natural hair in a way that doesn't just make it big and frizzy and poofy, I'm excited to grow it out! I understand your dilemma though.

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    1. @Michelle That's great you're excited to grow your hair out. I'd love to learn how to take care of my natural hair. I can do my sisters fine but somehow struggle with my new growth x

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  3. I haven't relaxed my hair since June 2013, but have constantly put it in protective styles for the past 8 months. I'm highlyyy debating to go back to natural, just because it has grown back! But having a box of hair relaxer in my house is not helping! I defo understandd you right now.

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    1. Yes I have relaxer in my house too. So tempting and not at the same time! x

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  4. I think I eventually want to stop relaxing too but I somehow think I can stop when my hair is long enough as the new growth will be easier to manage with longer hair but I dunno if that's the case lol. I just never know what to do with my hair when it's half and half, especially as I've stopped using my straighteners so it's harder to blend in/manage. Hmm, hair dilemas are just annoying! but I love your hair growth atm so I defo think seeing how long you can go without relaxing might be a good experiment? :)
    Saadiya x

    www.thatgirlsaadiya.blogspot.com

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    1. The blending is definitely the hardest part! Thank you Saadiya x

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  5. What ever decision you make I know it will be in your best interest. I would love to embrace my curls sometime in the future but not right now.

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    1. Thank you Tomes. I have the same feeling, it's hard! x

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  6. I'm in the same place you are, with regards to your hair. I really don't want to relax anymore but I'm a little terrified to take care of my natural hair. I've been researching Rusk's Anti Curl as an option but I just don't know yet. Have you read anything on this product?

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    1. Hi Melissa, hopefully you work it out soon. I've not heard of that product at all. What is it supposed to do to the hair? x

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    2. I believe it's supposed to make the curls more managable and less frizzy and easier to heat style. I first read about it here: http://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/curl-products/all-about-rusk-anticurl

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    3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  7. There have been many times over this last year and a half relaxed I wished I could come up with an alternative! I don't think heat-trained natural would work for me, seeing as I was natural and used heat 100% of the time and chia never got trained. I've researched several chemical-free relaxers, but they got super mixed reviews. I'm super excited to see what you decide Lesley :) Your hair is beautiful in every state xo

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    1. Thank you MJ, you're such a sweetheart. Every alternative I find to relaxing seems to have good and bad reviews ugh :|! I really thought I was on to a winner with the keratin treatments but I am so against getting it done at a salon as I can just imagine them singing my hair. Your hair is beautiful texturized and I'm considering that as an option too as I'm so torn between the two extremes - relaxed and natural x

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  8. I'm in a similar situation but from the opposite side (if that makes sense). I'm natural but am solo tempted to relax. But then I'm scared about growing it out and relaxed hair care. I want a middle ground. I tired design essentials STS (as you might remember) but I THINK it caused a set back. I'm going to do a post about it when I re-open my blog once i've done with my dissertation.

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    1. I completely get what you mean about wanting a middle ground as that's what I'm feeling. Relaxing is not for everyone so it's a difficult decision to make. The Design Essentials STS was something I was considering. I'll be interested to know how it's worked out for you x

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  9. Love your hair babe; I stopped relaxing about a year ago and I just do loads of protective styles cos the afro can get really difficult to deal with at times
    Afeeyah xo

    New post ~ http://smilerrr.blogspot.co.uk/2014/02/its-getting-hot-in-here-salsa.html

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    1. Thank you Afeeyah. Protective styling definitely stops me from getting too frustrated with my hair in general x

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  10. I was where you are some time ago, but I decided that now is not the time. I want to meet my relaxed hair goals, enjoy it for a time and then go natural.

    Abbi of BelowtheWaist

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    1. Thanks for commenting Abbi. That's what I always end up deciding eventually x

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  11. I can see where your coming from. I stopped relaxing my hair ago. I love it natural because there is so much bounce and it feels healthier. When I do wear it out, I mostly just straighten my hair... I found really positive reviews on one keratin treatment (forgot what it is called right now) so I may try that out and let you know how it goes ;)

    Either way your hair looks gorgeous

    xx,
    kuyeek's blog

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    1. Thank Kuyeek. I think it's the health and fullness which I love about natural hair, but I just can't seem to figure out how to manage my roots. I love the idea of keratin treatments, so I'd be interested to know how it works out for you x

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  12. Hello, maybe you could try the creme of nature's new relaxer called "straight from eden", it might be the "alternative" to a real relaxer that you are looking for :)

    and i love your blog:)

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    1. Thanks Shannon, I'll look into it :) x

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  13. Please don't go natural unless you are ready for it. The only thing that stops me from relaxing my hair is the hope that I will get to my desired length one day and I will be able to do whatever with it.

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    1. I don't think I am ready to just yet! Good luck with your hair goals :) x

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  14. I definitely understand you , but my hair is as long as my chin when straight, just not ready yet but yours is beautiful :)x

    www.fashwithray.blogspot.com

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  15. I am contemplating letting my hair grow 4 months post relaxing, but I already struggle so much with it when it reaches 2/3 months post-relaxing that I am afraid that I will have to deal with a lot of breakage and shedding then. After 2/3 months post, breakage and shedding increases excessively. What would you recommend for that situation?

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    1. Hi Andy, if you're getting breakage it might be because your hair needs more moisture or protein. Definitely stay on top of moisturising regularly and deep condition as much as you can. You also have to be very gentle with your hair and try not to manipulate it too much as the point where the relaxed parts meet your natural new growth are quite fragile. I hope this helps x

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  16. How did you get your hair back black after you henna'd you hair?

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    1. Hi Kyla, my hair is naturally very dark brown. The henna gives it a red tint, but you can't always see it - usually only in very bright light. In the picture above parts of my hair are reddish brown because they've caught the light. I haven't dyed my hair black since using henna x

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  17. Beautiful hair ! X

    ▬ WWW.FLYDP.BLOGSPOT.COM ▬

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  18. Your hair looks so fully and soft, love it!

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  19. Having read most of the comments here, i am so relieved that i'm not the only one who's been contemplating going natural after achieving a relaxed hair goal But when i think of all the time and effort it takes to manage the new growth on my hair during a relaxer stretch ,i ask my self if i'm ready to handle a full grown natural hair and the answer is always No (while shaking my head...lol.) I haven't got the courage to do that big chop.

    ProductsThatActuallyWork

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  20. Thank you ladies
    @Uzo Every time I do a long stretch I think about going natural! I don't have the courage to do a big chop either. Maybe one day, but not today :) x

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  21. Oh how I remember being in that position.... And for quite some time. I finally stopped relaxing June 2012. The first 8 months was the hardest for me. It is no longer an issue although I still have lots of relaxed ends. My hair is about waist length so although I have 22 months of natural hair I still have to deal with the straighter portion. It's all about being ready.... And once you are you'll still question going back to being relaxed but stick with it once you start, you'll be so happy you did in the long run.

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  22. I am hate my bone straight ends!!! I love my texlaxed hair but the ends are making me think crazy thoughts (((cutting))). Some days I even question my progress because of this. Trying to find the "Silver Lining." ;) - Colette

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  23. I have huge hair insecurities. I've been doing sew-in for the past 4 years and I'm finally ready to give them up. I'm so nervous about my natural hair. It used to break off so easily and I'm scared that it's going to happen again. I for sure will be giving up coloring it but I can't seem to let go of relaxing it. I feel so insecure about my natural hair.

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  24. I have huge hair insecurities. I've been doing sew-in for the past 4 years and I'm finally ready to give them up. I'm so nervous about my natural hair. It used to break off so easily and I'm scared that it's going to happen again. I for sure will be giving up coloring it but I can't seem to let go of relaxing it. I feel so insecure about my natural hair.

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    1. Hi Jackee-Lynn, I've only just seen your comment. It'll take time to get used to your texture but don't worry I'm sure styling it will be fine when you figure out what works for you x

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